5/2/10

OY GEVALT!!!

With a lovely Texan lilt...

Wow.
Just wow.

And yes, I AM having a cocktail.
And will most likely have another.

I started work this morning at 8:15. That's when I signed in.
Was SUPPOSED to be able to leave after I had "the folders" done.

For those who don't know... when you work "fer the govmint" there is a LARGE number of dead trees created. There are 10, count 'em 10 separate forms to fill out just to apply/work for the Census.
And of course the order and purpose is obscure and pointless.

Anyway, I've done this a couple of times so I expected to be able to leave fairly early.
As I Had Been Told To Expect To.

HAH!!!!!!!

9 Hours of working later,
I'm home, cocktail in hand still trying to figure out
What The Hell is Going On!

This will come as no surprise.

We started the day with NO PAPER work, (folders) for our new traineess
And no "kits".
You know, their books, supplies and silly things like that.

So I started in with some of the verbal training you CAN give without supplies.
WHY we do this, the HISTORY, Swearing them in, etc.

Well, folders showed up with the Attendance forms (D-275)
So I thought,
GOOD, I CAN GET STARTED NOW~

Silly me...
Not even half the people I had HAD folders or were on my attendance form.
So, I handed out what I had and started them filling them in .

Now, this is a process in itself.
Nothing is as you would think.
If you get ahead and SUPPOSE you know...
let's say, where to sign your name, or fill in a line.
You'll be WRONG.

THE RIGHT WAY THE WRONG WAY, THE CENSUS WAY!

I told everyone I would go slow because, SUPPOSEDLY folders for everyone were going to show up.

Well.... by noon, I had finished those who HAD their folders and sent EVERYONE to lunch.

So, there were 25 people, sitting around, being paid, doing nothing.
None of this was my responsibility, fault, or any doing of mine.

After lunch the kits showed up...
but of course NOT ENOUGH FOR EVERYONE.
So we gave out what we could.
Mostly to those who had folders and then untill we ran out.

I told everyone who didn't have a folder we were going to put them in another room
And when their folders arrived I would train them while everyone else got finger printed.

Right?
Logical?
Silly me....

The folders did show up.
I told those waiting to get fingerprinted in one room to study certain pages in their kits while they waited
And I started working on the paper work for the rest in another room.

Now by this point it's 1:30? 1:45?

We started them on the process.
Pain-stakingly going line by line.
So that everyone fills out the forms correctly.
And this takes an hour to an hour and half at least?

Just does.

So, around quarter to 3-3:15 everyone has their forms filled out.
I moved everyone into the same room,
because I want to start training Everyone on the Payroll forms (D-308s) at the same time.

I Thought training everyone at once would be
Economical and
Efficient.
Silly me Again...

The "OFFICE" started calling, complaining about,
"WHY DON'T WE HAVE THOSE FORMS?"

I thought...
"You mean the ones you got to us over half way through the day?
You mean the ones you didn't have ready to start the day with?
THOSE FORMS?!?!?"

Well, as you can imagine...
I wasn't TOO sympathetic with the poor overworked management wanting to get out of the office on a Sunday.

So, I had to stop and and go through the forms that THEY sent late.
To check for accuracy, order, make sure everything is checked off and done SOP (Standard Operating Procedure).
I had done this for those who HAD their forms during my nonexistent lunch.

So people are getting fingerprinted, I'm checking forms, answering questions and dismissing people who have completed their work for the day.

I'm getting a LITTLE dazed... frazzled?

Ok , I'll just say it.
DENSE by this point.

And unknown to me, someone had told SOME of the people WHERE their class was to be held the next day
and not told me.
So now, I don't know who knows where to go and who doesn't.

The only saving grace for this day is that I will most likely NOT be seeing any of these people again during my Census time.

They all lived in the Village or Lower East Side of even Brooklyn.
None of them are likely to be working in my Crew Leader District.
So whatever I did wrong they can blame on someone they'll never see again.

Good Goddess I need another drink NOW!

I'm GLAD I have a job
I'm GLAD I have a job
I'm GLAD I have a job
I'm GLAD I have a job

If you say something enough, does it make it true?

Sweet drinks and happy dreams...



2 comments:

pschaap said...

I was there yesterday and I'd say you captured the chaos admirably. But you neglected to say that, at least for this trainee, the crew leaders (or whatever the government calls you), were a very sweet crowd which made the whole thing bearable and, at times, even entertaining!

OUT OF WORK ACTOR said...

Thank you for the compliment.
One thing I always attempt to do is inject humor into the training. It makes it stick and pass easier. Good Luck with your stint with the Census