AS THE SUN SLOWLY SETS IN THE WEST....

I'll have a double.

As the Census (hopefully) winds down

Now is the time to pause and reflect

On what this experience has taught.

Belvedere vodka tastes good in a frozen martini glass

Evening

Afternoon

& Morning too.

Bloody Bulls are part of a healthy food group

NEVER EVER EVER work for the government.

...

My show opened last week, and we discovered, It's A Comedy!

We (the company) always have a good time

but were never sure what the reaction would be.

It's been gratifying.

Not only am I lucky enough to be working

with three wonderful actors who enjoy the journey each night

But I get to play an SOB.

What a pleasure.

So I'll take the $$ till the end.

I believe both events close June 20.

Then off to visit Mother.

so this might be one of the last blogs

At least about this subject.

If you've enjoyed it, Thanks

If not, screw you

Bonne Vie

SO, IT'S COME TO THIS...

I guess 'those who shall not be named' are feeling pressure?

While 'change' has been a constant companion, now change and threats are the mode of operation.

This week, old policies have been reinstated.

Which isn't too bad, since the enumerators already knew the procedure.

But now they want to give "New Policy" say at 5:00 pm

And then expect reports, schedules etc by 8:30 that night?

Really? Not likely.

You want to know who is working this weekend?

First, it's a HOLIDAY weekend.

Second, you had always told us NOT TO MAKE SCHEDULES.

Something to do about 'Night Differential'.

These unreasonable expectations truly reveal more about

those in charge than they realize.

Now we wake up to 10 emails

One which basically says ,

"If I don't have this by the morning (now) something bad will happen".

What?

I'll get hired full time and have to spend the rest of my life

dealing with incompetence on a level never seen before?

Will I have to tell my enumerators that there is another change?

Will you lay me off....

Again, while I AM GRATEFUL for the income

the incompetence and threats have long since

eroded away any measure of satisfaction.

Having never worked for 'the government' before

I had never experienced an organization

That constantly and institutionally shoves blame and responsibility downwards.

'A Few Bad Apples?'

Try looking at the orchard owner.

At this point, I don't really care anymore.

I will take the money as long as I can

Try to motivate and guide my enumerators

to the best of my ability and turn in our work when finished.

But I think it's time to quit reading email from those above.

It just shows they don't know what they're doing.

When management starts making vague threats

You know the proverbial excrement is about to hit the fan.

So, my appointment expires in 11 days.

Eleven LONG days.

And while there really isn't work out there, ending this would be like having a tooth pulled.

Frightening, painful, but in the long run much better for your health.

There has GOT to be a play or maybe off broadway musical in this charade somewhere.

Maybe a farce?

Oh well, it's only 6:00 am and I'm already to tired to care.

Bloody Mary Time.

NOTHING NEW HERE, PASS ALONG

Well it appears that the Great Payroll issue has been resolved.

It appears that everyone has been paid, caught up, past dues accrued and all is hunky dorry.

Now, we only have to deal with the daily changes in procedure.

...Been there done that.

They added layers of paper work.

Now they want us to do 'field reports' every other day showing our meetings with the Enumerators,

Or to let them put in their own words...

By field reports, I mean everything you do. So send me a summary of what happened for __(insert date)___.

They do not have to be super detailed. Just tell me the buildings your enumerators visited. Number of cases completed. Buildings you are trying to gain access to. Whatever thing census-related you did that you think I should know.

Do so for each day you will work from now on. Send me them either daily or 4 times a week. I should get these reports before I sign your 308 for that corresponding day.

Funny, I had sent in Info-Comms, D-225 for this.

Now they want it on another format so they can ignore it in duplicate.

What happened to the 5 page report I gave you on Thursday?

How about the report I sent in last night?

What happened to all the Info-Coms I gave you?

The emails I sent in? Still waiting for answers to..

"Is anybody there?

Does Anybody care?"

So while things sputter along,

and change is our constant companion

We'll continue to kill trees

In order to fulfill the government obsession with REPORTS

That no one seems to read, digest or act upon.

But It Protects Someone's Job, I Betcha!!

Oh well, two more weeks till my Appointment expires!

I'll keep checking to see if my pay hits each wednesday

and let the rest of the world go by.

Thankfully, I have rehearsals to keep me grounded in real life.

Stage is much more common sense oriented than working for the Government.

The senseless Census takes a good thing and makes it mad.

The Census takes a straight forward process and turns it into

a convoluted mess that makes no sense, progress or useful data.

Oh well, if I knew all the answers,

I wouldn't be an unemployed actor!

Keep the faith all.

TICK TOCK ... TICK TOCK

Will they finally pay us off?

Counting down to the next day...

A day of anticipation...

A day of calculation....

A day, so far, of frustration.

The big question is,

Will 'Those who shall not be named'

Finally pay us, on time, in full,

No mistakes?

Who knows.

They certainly don't seem to.

With daily changes in the rules,

A seemingly eternal struggle for control.

The integral part of just 'Getting It Done'

Seems to be the unwanted step child

in this dysfunctional ... group.

With almost daily work rule's changes,

and making them retroactive,

Those on high continue to undermine

any vestiges of competence that linger in their midst.

From below it appears like clouds,

In a strong wind.

Blowing into each other

Taking bits and pieces and forming new shapes.

Only to have those collapse to be replaced

By another, made up of vapors and mist.

Nothing is solid

Nothing is secure

What we were taught is tossed in the can

Procedure is myth

Correct is whim

If I ran a business, in this manner,

It would be bankrupt in a month

But the clients would have walked in a week.

'Good Enough For Government Work'?

Is this what it means?

I'm now truly amazed that ANYTHING gets done...

Barkeep, bloody mary please...

Eat, Drink and be...

the best that you can be

cheers

NO PAY, NO PLAY?

Well, it appears that the US Census is incapable of paying on time.

I was shorted 13 hours on my second pay period

And now it appears that my third pay was only for those 13 hours.

Even though I had worked 44.75 hours for the third period.

So, let's see if we can do the math...

Back pay owed, 13 hours, plus $4.50 reimbursement for expense.

Current hours due, 44.75 plus $4.50 for reimbursement.

Pay received?

APPEARS to be only for the 13 hours owed from previous pay period.

(We don't receive earning statements until a week after payment)

It is half of the pay I received for my first week of 33.25 hours.

Funny. That doesn't add up for me.

What does this mean?

Not only did I not get paid for hours worked.

But my team of Census Takers (enumerators) will not receive anything.

Possible outcomes?

All my team quits.

All census work ceases.

Angry Enumerators picket my building?

Call me nasty names?

Now, I don't know about all my team.

But some are like me, living paycheck to paycheck.

Having been laid off for a LONG time.

Not getting paid on time means,

not eating,

not paying rent,

not paying bills.

Likely response from the Census?

"You'll receive it."

"It was just a mistake."

"Blah Blah Blah Blah."

I had attempted to call the LCO (local census office) last week,

in order to be proactive and find out if

A. The payroll forms had been turned in

B. IF not all, Which had been turned in.

That way I could prepare my team for what might be.

Result?

"BLAH BLAH BLAH, busy.

Blah blah blah, computer tied up.

blah blah blah, can't help you."

Now, I'm just too mad to call.

Afraid I will call them out on their incompetence.

I'm not saying that the data entry people are to blame.

But there is NO SYSTEM IN PLACE to FLAG when a whole district is not paid?

No one notices when it appears that a portion of the workforce is not getting paid?

It appears they moved the deadline date for turning in payroll forms

WITHOUT telling anyone in the field?

Of course the people in the office got paid correctly.

Wow.

Not only incompetent but...

what is the word I'm looking for?

Not sure I can use it in mixed company

But this really isn't acceptable.

Once, I can understand.

We were just getting started, it was crazy, disorganized.

BUT, twice?

A whole week's pay?

Sorry, this just doesn't fly.

Of course my options are limited.

I CAN'T quit, I would lose my unemployment.

So once again the CENSUS has us by the short hairs.

Once again, 'those who shall not be named'

have screwed those who actually DO the work.

There will be no consequences for those in charge.

And the little people will be expected to ...

Just Carry On...

Be Grateful For Work...

Accept incompetence from those above...

Well, at least I can blog about it...

It's too early to drink yet!

GUESS I SHOULDA KNOWN.....

Here I thought...

I’v got my Census Takers their Binders

Now, I can observe them on their rounds

Correct and guide when uncertainty occurred.

Everything would start working as planned.

What a cockeyed optimist I am.

First, a little time-line info.

On Tues, 5/4 around 6:00PM - I received Binders for my crew.

When I got home, I emailed my crew,

Letting them know I had them,

And would assign them Wednesday, 5/5.

Because I don’t trust things to come to me correctly

From ‘those who shall not be named’

I spent Wednesday morning going through the binders.

Making sure what was supposed to be there, was there.

Then assigned the Binders to my enumerators on Wednesday.

Spent some time reviewing procedure etc with them one at a time

And wished them well and sent them on their way

I reminded them I had to ‘observe’ them doing some interviews

During the first week.

Thursday I scheduled and observed two of my enumerators.

And scheduled three more for today, Friday.

Well, imagine my surprise when Thursday evening, around 9:00PM

An email was delivered. ( I didn’t get it till Friday, today)

It stated that

“...Give a list of all the AA Binder #'s you have assigned to your district.

Include a brief summary of how the enumeration process is going along. Give an expected time frame of when you will finish the binders you currently have. “

And I thought,

you mean the Binders I JUST GOT and JUST CHECKED OUT?

What data was I supposed to base this summary on?

Fantasy? Best hopes? Wish fulfillment?

...Time frame to completion?

How about the same time frame it will take for

‘those who shall not be named’

to get their act together.

Needless to say, I didn’t send them any such thing.

Because if the past is any indication,

This information would be used to blame.

“”Why don’t you have this done as you said in your estimation?!?!”

Incompetence and disorganization seems to mean blame those below you.

Those who are actually out in the field, doing the work.

As someone who spent thirty years working in Government told me.

Get used to it.

So, I’ll just keep plugging along.

Helping my enumerators where and when I can

Fending off those from above

Who seem intent on creating confusion, discontent

And distrust to those above.

Is it too early to have a cocktail at 10 in the morning?

THE COMFORT OF ROUTINE

As the sun sets

And sirens scream

The horns do honk

And neighbors scream

I settle into an easy pattern of routine.

Ahhhhhhhh

All binders have been assigned.

My Enumerators sated.

Eager to begin

and take back taxes they hated.

This as getting my tax money back.

Starting tomorrow they will make their rounds.

I'll "observe" each on on their sundry grounds

In order to ensure they have their patter down.

I don't expect

Many missteps

But a few

Will give us something to laugh about

When we all say adieu.

This blog has been my saving grace

Without I might have been disgraced

My mouth would lead me into lairs

Where wiser men never would have dared.

So I hope you have enjoyed my time.

The future unsure my words decline.

If events unfold with a spark of glee

I'll gladly report them all to thee.

Sweet journeys

And dreams

You wishes Fulfilled

Outstretch your arms

Your hope to fill.

adieu

HIP HIP HOORAY TAH RAH TAH RAH

The Binders Are Coming!

The Binders Are Coming!

Actually, they're here.

In Census speak, "binder" is an AA Binder (Assignment Area Binder)

When you are an Enumerator it means WORK!!

So I was quite happy to notify my crew that I had a binder for each of them.

Now, who knows how long this elation will last.

This may be the only binders we get.

And we would be out of luck and work.

But I don't think so.

This is New York and how many people do You think DIDN'T fill out their questionnaires?

Finally, to be doing what my job title entails, Crew LEADER.

Think of it as a pit boss of market research who works from home.

To be able to start your day with fresh ground coffee you make yourself.

Have some breakfast.

Then Juice, and I don't mean orange.

Then I do my morning ablutions and start the day.

It's so fun, nice, convenient to work from home.

Most of my Enumerators use email so instructions only need be sent out once.

For our daily meets, we live within a 3 block radius of each other

So we meet at my apartment building, or a coffee shop.

Convenience is such a pleasant word.

I was worried for a bit.

I only had 3 binders at first and 8 enumerators.

Who should I assign them to?

Should I help those who are unemployed and most in need?

Or should I assign to those with the most ability who will make my job easier?

A Quandry.

And not one I'm familiar with or wanted to handle.

Compassion or efficiency. Which would win out?

But luckily it has been resolved in the best of ways.

All will work.

Which means so will I.

So this evening is a good one.

The day was without turmoil and has ended on an up note.

I look forward to getting started

And hope for a long run.

Take your time to answer, dear readers.

Tell them to come back some other time.

Make appointments and miss them.

We'll keep coming till the end.

Au revoir mes amis.

boisson jusqu'à vous vous sentez joli

CALMER... SLOWER...PEACEFUL...

Sigh....

Much easier day.

At least it ended that way. lol

I was up early, and not necessarily for Census, I just am.

Had been told yesterday I was training another group this morning down on Seventh Avenue.

So, I got up, got ready.

Had my coffee and prepared to start training.

I arrived as usual a half hour early, as per SOP.

And was a bit surprised to see a trainee already there.

Turns out he was told to show up at 8:30!

A courier from the LCO (local census office) was also at the training site,

So we waited, and waited and waited...

Finally I decided I should try to find Someone who knew what was going on.

The courier told me to call a Specific person at the LCO.

So, I did.

I explained the situation and asked if she knew what was going on.

Evidently the training for the site I was at had been canceled.

Surprise!

So, I asked "What should I do?"

She said she'd call me back.

We waited, and waited.

So I decided, I'll call her back.

She said all of us should go to Another training site,

where I could drop off my trainee and see if they needed me.

Well, they didn't need me so I left.

Got to go to a meeting with My supervisor and fellow CLs (crew leaders) and get some AA Binders assigned.

Actually doing what I was trained to do.

Felt good.

Of course Sara received more binders than any of us. (got ya' Sara)

But I had been on the clock for 2 hours at that point so didn't feel too bad.

Went home, did a little administrative work.

Took a nap.

Got up, did a little more work and called some of my crew to schedule meetings.

Then took another break and ate.

Had a meeting with two of my crew and then finished for the day.

THIS is what it should be like.

Civilized.

Evenly paced.

Time for a nap in the middle of the day.

Now that's living.

So now I'm having my Belvedere, straight up in my frozen martini glass.

Looking out my wrap around windows on the 17th floor and feeling mellow.

Yes, sometimes things get better.

But I'm not fooled.

I won't expect this to be an everyday occurrence.

But I will certainly enjoy it when it happens.

May pleasant surprises greet you when needed.

The unpleasant occur when able to deal.

Good friends abound and funds aplenty.

And booze enough to float a barge.

Pleasant days and nights to you all.

OY GEVALT!!!

With a lovely Texan lilt...

Wow.

Just wow.

And yes, I AM having a cocktail.

And will most likely have another.

I started work this morning at 8:15. That's when I signed in.

Was SUPPOSED to be able to leave after I had "the folders" done.

For those who don't know... when you work "fer the govmint" there is a LARGE number of dead trees created. There are 10, count 'em 10 separate forms to fill out just to apply/work for the Census.

And of course the order and purpose is obscure and pointless.

Anyway, I've done this a couple of times so I expected to be able to leave fairly early.

As I Had Been Told To Expect To.

HAH!!!!!!!

9 Hours of working later,

I'm home, cocktail in hand still trying to figure out

What The Hell is Going On!

This will come as no surprise.

We started the day with NO PAPER work, (folders) for our new traineess

And no "kits".

You know, their books, supplies and silly things like that.

So I started in with some of the verbal training you CAN give without supplies.

WHY we do this, the HISTORY, Swearing them in, etc.

Well, folders showed up with the Attendance forms (D-275)

So I thought,

GOOD, I CAN GET STARTED NOW~

Silly me...

Not even half the people I had HAD folders or were on my attendance form.

So, I handed out what I had and started them filling them in .

Now, this is a process in itself.

Nothing is as you would think.

If you get ahead and SUPPOSE you know...

let's say, where to sign your name, or fill in a line.

You'll be WRONG.

THE RIGHT WAY THE WRONG WAY, THE CENSUS WAY!

I told everyone I would go slow because, SUPPOSEDLY folders for everyone were going to show up.

Well.... by noon, I had finished those who HAD their folders and sent EVERYONE to lunch.

So, there were 25 people, sitting around, being paid, doing nothing.

None of this was my responsibility, fault, or any doing of mine.

After lunch the kits showed up...

but of course NOT ENOUGH FOR EVERYONE.

So we gave out what we could.

Mostly to those who had folders and then untill we ran out.

I told everyone who didn't have a folder we were going to put them in another room

And when their folders arrived I would train them while everyone else got finger printed.

Right?

Logical?

Silly me....

The folders did show up.

I told those waiting to get fingerprinted in one room to study certain pages in their kits while they waited

And I started working on the paper work for the rest in another room.

Now by this point it's 1:30? 1:45?

We started them on the process.

Pain-stakingly going line by line.

So that everyone fills out the forms correctly.

And this takes an hour to an hour and half at least?

Just does.

So, around quarter to 3-3:15 everyone has their forms filled out.

I moved everyone into the same room,

because I want to start training Everyone on the Payroll forms (D-308s) at the same time.

I Thought training everyone at once would be

Economical and

Efficient.

Silly me Again...

The "OFFICE" started calling, complaining about,

"WHY DON'T WE HAVE THOSE FORMS?"

I thought...

"You mean the ones you got to us over half way through the day?

You mean the ones you didn't have ready to start the day with?

THOSE FORMS?!?!?"

Well, as you can imagine...

I wasn't TOO sympathetic with the poor overworked management wanting to get out of the office on a Sunday.

So, I had to stop and and go through the forms that THEY sent late.

To check for accuracy, order, make sure everything is checked off and done SOP (Standard Operating Procedure).

I had done this for those who HAD their forms during my nonexistent lunch.

So people are getting fingerprinted, I'm checking forms, answering questions and dismissing people who have completed their work for the day.

I'm getting a LITTLE dazed... frazzled?

Ok , I'll just say it.

DENSE by this point.

And unknown to me, someone had told SOME of the people WHERE their class was to be held the next day

and not told me.

So now, I don't know who knows where to go and who doesn't.

The only saving grace for this day is that I will most likely NOT be seeing any of these people again during my Census time.

They all lived in the Village or Lower East Side of even Brooklyn.

None of them are likely to be working in my Crew Leader District.

So whatever I did wrong they can blame on someone they'll never see again.

Good Goddess I need another drink NOW!

I'm GLAD I have a job

I'm GLAD I have a job

I'm GLAD I have a job

I'm GLAD I have a job

If you say something enough, does it make it true?

Sweet drinks and happy dreams...

YIPPEE KI YAY

SCREEEEEECHHHHH!!!!

Crash Kapow Sproing! Kablam !

This will come as a surprise to no one, but...

Remember when I had said everyone was trained and now the next step is getting them out in the field?

Not only am I starting to teach a whole new group, tomorrow morning but...

I received a call this evening in the manner of an "emergency".

It turns that our LCO (local census office) had called a LARGE number of people, telling them to report for training to various locations.

But of course they were not only NOT assigned to a district, they were NOT given ID numbers AND allowed to finish training.

Their D-308s (payroll forms) were not collected as per instructions and NOW all of a sudden field supervisors have to correct all this.

Even though none of these people are in our district.

And the instructions were NOT to collect the forms.

Now "it's an emergency" these forms must be collected today!

Now this is after 5PM on a saturday night. Most of the crew leaders are approaching their overtime limit and don't even know any of these people.

And how many of these people are going to be home? This is New York.

And the LCO will NOT pay anymore than already budgeted.

So, let me see if I get this.

Management screwed up and the lower level supervisors are supposed to fix it without being paid?

Really?

They don't know me very well do they?

This employment is what is referred to as "time limited employment".

After 8 weeks your appointment expires and if needed you can be extended.

This is just so no one accrues time for Federal Benefits.

Understandable.

There is no chance of it turning into a real job or lasting longer than the Census takes.

(And after what I've seen I wouldn't take it if offered)

And management expects us to GIVE them time?

Silly dears. Not bloody likely.

I gave enough time to get my 45 hours and not one minute more.

What's the old adage? You get more with honey than vinegar?

Well, you definitely get more by asking nicely, politely, with gratitude, than with threats.

Frankly, fire my ass.

I'll go back on unemployment and show up at your door step protesting in full costume, signage and the press.

If you don't know me, believe me I'd do it.

I have.

I'm starting to feel like Rep Bachmann from Minnesota about the Census.

But of course my reasons are based on personal experience. Not flights of fantasy and distortions of history.

It's just an example, on a scale I've never experienced before, of "Do what I say, not what I do".

And much like the managers of the mines in WV they expect you to get everything done irregardless of proper procedure regarding payroll/hours or pretty much anything else.

But of course they can use those procedures to call you out when it suits them.

Sounds like a cross between Don Blankenship, Dick Cheney and Senator Boehner.

"I live in a fantasy world. What I say is true irregardless of the facts".

Luckily in our case no one can be injured.

Well, I'm having a martini. Planning tomorrow class and wondering...

Will I have a job for a fourth week?

Do I want this job for a fourth week?

Don't get me wrong, I am VERY GLAD to be working.

I think I'm pretty good at what I do.

But I don't tolerate rude disrespectful behavior from anyone.

I don't take bullying either.

Treat me as an adult and we'll get along.

Oh well, we'll see what we shall see.

I guess I shouldn't be surprised by anything from this organization anymore.

Barkeep! Set up another round!

SLOW AND GRACEFULLY...

I just finished with my last trainee and gave the info to my CrewLeaderAssistants.

I still can't believe they have me as a "CREW LEADER".

I mean, really. ME? Kind of like MEN IN TIGHTS but in New York...

Hopefully we'll receive info soon about our next step.

NOT about doing the Census. I just spent a week training them on that!

But on WHEN

I wonder how many conflicting calls, emails, info blasts we'll all get?

Will one person be giving out that pertinent info or, will our LCO (local census office) have a variety of people call from lists (all outdated) to pass along information (that inevitably is incorrect) to we low level few, the poor, the gifted, the clueless about where our AA binders (for you non-government speak this refers to the area being interviewed on Census Questionnaires) are and when to assign them and when to begin.

Wanna start a betting pool about this one?
I'll choose - "none of the above"

Oh well, confusion leads to $$
And as I've said before, I'M A HO I AM.

So while the training aspect of this joyous journey through Census Land has passed. I look forward to the endeavors of the next part of our journey.

The Valley of DOOOR MEN

"YOU AIN'T GETTING IN THIS BUILDING"

The Mountains of Refuses

"WHY SHOULD I TELL YOU THAT?"

And of course my favorite...

The Plains of Confusion.

Let's hope we all have a merry band that will do their best, realize they have no power. And other than the pay, their safety is the most important aspect of this glorious journey we've all embarked upon.

May the wind be at your back
May your shoes not crack
The ho's and addicts ignore you
and all respondents adore you.

Fair journeys to us all.

Where's my margarita?

BEGINNING OFTHE END?

Or end of the beginning.

I can't believe it!
It "appears" that all our little probationary Census Takers have finished their training!
Well, almost... there are a few loose ends and canons to take care of.

Everyone keeps saying, "The Census is Coming! The Census is Coming!"
Supposed to start May 1. I wouldn't bet my last dollar on it.

For my district, I will be finished "training" by tomorrow noon. I am also meeting with and training my CLAs (Crew Leader Assistant).

I HOPE NO ONE IN MY DISTRICT sent the Questionnaire back!
I want to work as long as I can.
Or until I get a show, whichever pays more.

It will seem strange and lonely not to see my fellow Crew Leaders and their Enumerators every day,
but I'll get over it.
Hopefully now I can focus on and review just what the heck MY JOB IS!.
I know I have responsibilities both administrative & supervisory.
But I can't for the life of me recall what it is.

Guess I'll have to dive back into the .... manuals.

da da dummmmm

Not exactly what you would consider light reading.
More like what you would grab on a flight to Australia.
Put you right to sleep.

But I'm sure it will all come back to me, if I ever knew it in the first place.

After all, I'm An Actor. I can make anyone believe I am what I want them to believe.

Wait ... isn't that a psychotic? Well, is there really any practical difference?

So,
To all the ones I've known before
to all the ones I've moooooned before
I'll have a drink of wine
I'll have it one more time
To all the ones I've known before...

Good Luck to you all. I hope we don't fall away
but I'm sure we'll see each other again someday

and say, "Wait, who was that guy?"

YOU BETTER SMILE WHEN YOU SAY THAT!

Whew!

It's 9:30pm and I'm finally sitting down, martini in hand after a fairly long day.

First training of the day, I arrived at 8:30 this morning. Had the usual group, trying to prep them to take their first tentative steps out into the world.

The little darlings. So hopeful, so expectant. So unprepared.

Trying to get them used to unrealized expectations.

I had told them they would be going out in the field today.

NOT!

But we did get a bit of the next day done so they don't have to spend too much time on their last class day, whenever it might be.

Of course we did have a few who, hopefully, benefited from the delay of doing "live field work".

They WEREN'T ready at all. Fairly nervous, unsure, resentful.

You know, like a bride on her wedding night. So we had practice sessions.

Then I had an evening group, unknown to me or me to them so daring was called for. Give 'em a laugh or shock. Anything to help them remember the endless drivel I'm reading to them that hopefully will help when they go out on their own.

Hopefully they will all realize that they will get it, and if they don't they won't die. They'll get paid and they'll either continue or not. It's neither earth changing or shattering.

It's a paycheck.

So to all my fellow Crew Leaders I raise my frozen martini glass and spit in your eye.

Here's hoping we survive longer than predicted, make more money than expected and have better memories than Johnny Walker can supply.

Good Luck to you one and all.

EITHER I'M GETTING BETTER AT THIS OR JUST NUMB!

Well, I made it home without having a single alcoholic beverage.

While my feet are a bit tired. I'm not quite in the haze I was yesterday.

Today Was a lot to hash out. We started training our little "trainees" on How To Take The Census!

ta dummmmm

As usual I stood up front and did my schtick.... I mean read the manual verbatim.

Hmmmmmmm ..... well, I did as well as can be expected.

There was a LOT to cover and the poor little lambs seem to get more and more glazed as the day wore on.

We did have few who seemed to obsess over one little issue. And go on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on ...( you get the picture) about it.

Even if we moved to another subject they always brought it back to what they were worried about/didn't understand.

At that point I DID WANT A DRINK, I even asked one of my fellow Crew Leaders if he brought a flask. Which got a laugh. Some of the trainees were annoyed at the pointlessness of going over the same thing so many times.

It's kind of fun observing my trainees and seeing which ones are going to need hand holding and which are going to be just fine.

Also seeing who I want to use as my Crew Leader Assistant

OOOOOOHHH Doesn't that sound exciting and fun?

I have one who wants to be and one I think might be better at it. I wonder if I'm even going to get one?!

Oh well, tomorrow should be fun. I start the morning with training. Then when my little angels get kicked out of the nest I won't be there!

I have to go and train DAY 2 MORNING (second time) at a Night Class!!

I guess this will be as close as I ever get to miss seeing my child take its first step.

I'll live.

Till next time Live, Dream, Drink and Drive.

Second Day of "First Day"

Well, we did it again only better.

The Wonderful World Of Census led us yesterday into indoctrinating another group of Census Taker Trainees. Instead of getting all of them together at one time our fearless leaders decided to break it up into numerous smaller groups all over and at various times.

So the people who train them, including this poster, get to repeat themselves endlessly, confusedly and everywhere.

I gotta say my second day of "First Day Training" did go much smoother. But I don't expect that to be a pattern. And who knows I might get to do a third day of "First Day Training".

But as of now I'm getting ready to do a day of Second Day Training to a group consisting of 4 Crew Leader Districts and might even be teaching some evening classes.

Since the First Day was all about paper work, getting everyone fingerprinted and into the "System" it was pretty boring.

I'm looking forward too(?) actually training them on how to do what they're going to be doing. Since the class after Second Day (today), Third Day, actually includes some field work, getting out and asking questions.

Then they "should" have one more day of class work to review and be out in the field doing Census Taking.

Wow, if this is any example of how things get done for the government I think it's time to move to a Very Small Island and start my own. But for now, confusion leads to more hours and I'll take every $$$ I can get.

Till later fellow sufferers/travelers and those who just wonder what the heck I'm babbling about.

The no longer lonely but hopefully paid Crew Leader.

FINISH OF DAY ONE!!

OY!!!

The first day, what can I say?

Wait, let me have a pitcher or margaritas first.....

Ok, now I can continue.

Whew, doing paper work for the federal government can be soooo frustrating.

The paper work is LONG and everyone thinks they know what to do next. Even if you tell them not to get ahead they do, and then it's wrong. Because?

There is the right way, the wrong way and THE CENSUS WAY.

Then we fingerprinted.

I thought elementary kids with finger painting could be rough. They ain't got nothing on a roomful of... mostly middle aged people. (I can say that because I am one)

But we got through it and do it once again tomorrow for a whole new group of Enumerator Trainees.

I think a hip flask is going to be part of the ensemble tomorrow. And around lunch time I'm going to point to a corner in the back of the room and scream, "Oh My God, it's Michael Jackson!"

Then turn and take a sip of some smooth brandy. AHHHHHH

Well, income is income and that's what I need.

Till the next installment of the the Lonely Census worker! HiO Silver AWAY!!1

First Day

Well after two weeks of training, hmmm (training refers to the acquisition of knowledge, skills, and competencies as a result of the teaching ofvocational or practical skills and knowledge that relate to specific useful competencies.)

Ok, maybe that's a little too strong.

My first day of imparting what little I've learned to those who will be doing it.

Now THAT'S a scary thought.

Today we Crew Leaders start the process of training those who will be going door to door for the next eight weeks (or more or less) on the proper procedures to follow in order to get the data to the Census!

It's one of those experiences where you truly learn by doing. The fire will burn the chaff away, hopefully.

As I say, "There is the right way, the wrong way and THE CENSUS WAY".

So as I get ready to head off into the sunset, uh... sunrise, Get along you little doggies and let's round up those recalcitrant populace who don't answer the Census Questionnaires.

More to come, if I survive.